• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to footer

Oh Well

  • About This Blog

Rubbish Christmas Presents Volume 7

1 November 2006 by Tim 18 Comments

(Rubbish Clothes)

A long time ago, Mr Levi started making work wear called jeans. He put a little label on the outside (and a rivet in the crotch). It was good work wear and very successful. Some time in the 1950s people decide that it was comfortable to wear (without the rivet in the crotch, by now) and his jeans became very fashionable.

Who in their right mind pays for jeans which have been half worn out before you buy them? Why not get a new pair and wear them out yourself?

Hold on, it gets worse, now, not only can you get your jeans pre-ruined, you can get New Levi’s Redwire Jeans Made for iPod – “The RedWire DLX Jeans will have an iPod remote control and docking station fitted in its pockets, and comes complete with attached headphones.” I mean, why? Trousers with headphones? That has to be rubbish!

As I would understand it, football clubs are paid huge amounts of money to display manufacturers logos and advertising slogans on their team strips. If you are not being paid for it, why walk round looking like a billboard? On top of that, I looked at a few of these in a sport shop a while ago, and as far as I could tell, these shirts are poorly made of thin, cheap synthetics. If they hadn’t been spoiled by having advertising plastered all over them, they would probably sell in a cheap clothing shop for a couple of pounds. Finally, these are sports wear, you do not need to wear any kind of special clothing to sit on your sofa, drink beer and eat crisps. At ยฃ40 – ยฃ50 a shot, these shirts make a superb rubbish gift. But make sure you choose carefully, find out which club your giftee supports first – and buy them a different one. Make sure you are there when they open it.

Lastly, for real rubbish clothes, look out for absolutely anything which has three stripes down it. These are the ultimate in rubbish, poor quality and expensive, the sartorial equivalent of a great big arrow pointing at the wearer with a sign attached flashing the word chav.

Filed Under: Rubbish Christmas

« Rubbish Christmas Presents Volume 6
Rubbish Christmas Presents Volume 8 »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Debbie says

    1 November 2006 at 14:53

    Oh Jax, you’re getting old LOL, but I agree with you totally *sigh*
    **Hugs BTW**
    XX

    Reply
  2. Chris says

    1 November 2006 at 15:21

    That was so obviously not Jax posting.

    Reply
  3. Tim says

    1 November 2006 at 15:54

    Thanks Chris :wave:
    (Jax is the proud owner of one of these)

    Reply
  4. Debbie says

    1 November 2006 at 19:48

    Oh dear. Well then I agree with whoever wrote it LOL

    Reply
  5. rosie says

    1 November 2006 at 23:22

    what are these blue-stripe clothes? are they from Tescos? if so, very post-modern ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Reply
  6. HelenHaricot says

    2 November 2006 at 00:40

    yeah, is SOOOO Tim! It looks like tescos to me, so I must be a chav – having a number of tesco’s very finest ‘value’ clothes in my wardrobe. [or in fact wearing some]

    Reply
  7. Tim says

    2 November 2006 at 09:53

    Supposed to be 3 white stripes ๐Ÿ™

    Reply
  8. Nic says

    2 November 2006 at 11:18

    Lol and I know a man who’s entire wardrobe pretty much consists of football shirts, but I don’t remember the last time he kicked a ball!

    Reply
  9. Alison says

    2 November 2006 at 15:45

    I heart adidas ๐Ÿ˜›
    June this year Nic ๐Ÿ˜‰ (Well, last time *I* saw him with a ball!)

    Reply
  10. Jax says

    2 November 2006 at 19:44

    that is *not* the shirt I have! Can’t find a picture of it online, but there’s no blue lines round mine.

    Reply
  11. Jax says

    2 November 2006 at 20:35

    Found it

    Reply
  12. Liberta says

    3 November 2006 at 10:46

    Why pick on football shirts? I agree they are hateful, slobbish and and unflattering to even the most svelte of physiques, but… it is really really difficult to purchase clothes that do not advertise who made them.
    If you pick on “sport” clothing it looks like you are picking on the “football and chips” classes. What about the Burberry,Paul Smith and Dolce & Gabbana classes?

    Reply
  13. Tim says

    3 November 2006 at 11:50

    They are the same thing. The football shirt is merely the most glaring example.

    Reply
  14. Chris says

    3 November 2006 at 12:31

    Hmmmm…surely at least part of the reason the clubs get paid huge amounts of money is *because* thousands of people walk around wearing them as free billboards. In other words the fans buying the shirts help to keep the sponsorship revenues high which helps their clubs compete. In other words there is something in it for the fan.
    Reading’s Premiership shirt is ร‚ยฃ28…..little more than 5 packets of fags.

    Reply
  15. Tim says

    3 November 2006 at 14:52

    Or eight packs of Sainsbury’s fresh chicken breast fillets.
    But you would look pretty silly wearing them too.
    Or, you could buy nearly a dozen reasonable quality plain t shirts, in different colours. How exciting is that!

    Reply
  16. Nic says

    3 November 2006 at 16:54

    yeah I think the point is you show visible support for your football team of choice, while actually giving some level of financial support by virtue of paying more than the shirt is worth in terms of cloth.

    Reply
  17. Tim says

    3 November 2006 at 18:49

    I must admit to a certain curiosity as to how far fans are prepared to take this. Would they be prepared to wear anything?
    And surely if the intention is to just give money to the club, why not, um, just give them money.

    Reply
  18. Nic says

    3 November 2006 at 20:24

    I think that is possibly extreme ๐Ÿ˜‰
    But as I said, it is not *just* the intention to give money to the club, it is primarily the same reason as people have worn all sorts of uniform or fashions historically – to show visible support, some sort of tribal thing, to indicate where their loyalties lie etc.

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Footer

Archives

Categories

Search

Copyright © 2025 ยท Tim Marchant ยท Cookie Policy ยท Privacy Policy ยท Log in