With apologies to Jonathan who has been at work today and who has therefore spent the morning reading The Register
“The Northumbria Safety Camera Partnership, aka “Safe speed for life” has just published its top 10 excuses for geting nobbled by a speed, sorry, safety camera.”
- I had passed out after seeing flashing lights, which I believed to be UFOs in the distance. The flash of the camera brought me round from my trance.
- I was in the airport’s flight path and I believe the camera was triggered by a jet overhead, not my car.
- I had a severe bout of diarrhoea and had to speed to a public toilet.
- There was a strong wind behind my car which pushed me over the limit.
- My friend had just chopped his fingers off and I was rushing the fingers to hospital.
- The vibrations from the surfboard I had on the roof rack set off the camera.
- I had to rush my dying hamster to the vets.
- A violent sneeze caused a chain reaction where my foot pushed down harder on the accelerator.
- There was a suspected case of foot and mouth and I had to rush to see the cow concerned.
- The only way I could demonstrate my faulty clutch was to accelerate madly.